Back to School for Memoir Writers, As Well

READY, SET, WRITE! That’s how most people think writing memoir will go, whether it be in blog form, a series of essays, or a full-length book. But anyone who is actually doing it will tell you that they spend a lot of their time asking why is writing so hard? There once was a time when I was terribly polite about this work and what it requires. At cocktail parties when someone asked me what I do, and just above my string of pearls I’d smile and reply, “I’m a writer,” and nearly to a person, he’d say he was going to write when he retired. Nodding, I’d wish him the best with it and slink off to find the canapés, wondering what was wrong with me that I was going to devote my whole life to writing, when clearly people who were smarter than I could put it off until they got around to it.

Now, I’m not so polite. Now, when someone tells me that he is going to become a writer when he gets around to it, I reply, “And what do you do?” And sometimes he says, “Oh, I’m a brain surgeon,” and that’s my favorite reply because then I can say, “When I retire I’m going to become a brain surgeon,” with just a hint of a sneer above those pearls.

Writing is serious work and is not for the mere brain surgeons among us, but for those who resolve that this is the year you finally write some pieces of memoir. Or perhaps a whole book. And here it is, the best time of  the year to start: The new school year, that totemic time when we all get back to business. What better time to get to work? Need more inspiration than that? Here’s a two-word tip on how: Be hospitable.

Sounds easy, doesn’t it? Being hospitable in writing means many things, but going into this marathon of family observation let’s just choose one way to be hospitable to your memoir writing.

Let’s take notes. Literally.

Being hospitable means getting a stack of index cards and putting one in each pocket, in the back pocket of your jeans, and taking it out at the movies when you see someone make a great transition from one emotion to the next, making note of the spare gesture employed that conveyed the change. Write it down. Get a few notebooks, and write things down.

But here’s the rub: This does not require an expensive digital recorder, leather notebook, or Cartier pen. That’s shopping instead of writing. That’s showing off. That’s going into debt.

Get some index cards. Write down some stuff down, and resolve that now is your time to write memoir. When you need help, check in with me. I’ve got some how-to right here. Pretend this is a new school year for you, as well, and get to work.